sorry. i really didnt mean it as a lie or hide from you. its just that i feel its not letting down thats why i said that.. fuck. should have told you my hairstyle, and not just tell you "i'm not letting down my hair". fuck. i'm sorry.
i know your friends and projects are stressing you out.. i know you're stressed.. just... take a break sometimes and drink lots of water.. i promise i wont add onto your stress. thats why i'm speaking and voicing my thoughts and feelings here..
rt rt rt rt. tiring. painful. really so much to rant. so much to share with you. but i dont want to, bc i dont want you to know. i dont wish you to know the effects of this diagnose. i dont wish you to worry.
its very little time left. i really dont want to go and give in to this, when we are still in bad terms or rocky.
i'll give you sometime to cool down.. and for me to straighten out the ways to make sure what i am saying will be what you are thinking too.. so as to avoid misunderstandings again like this, for no reason. we both get hurt for nothing, but just different understanding of the words. i'm sorry.
i still have more rt, more surgerys, more risks coming along. tbh i really dk to tell you everything, or to hide those major risks and diagnoses.
life, so dramatic. and dramas, so realistic.
